I work in a very small department, where there are 2 older women and 2 younger (one being me). We have a manager, then above him, two attorneys, one who is an associate and the other who is the VP. Lately, the two older ladies have been giving me a hard time, watching what I’m doing, who I’m talking to, for how long etc… and telling my manager every little thing, even though I don’t treat them that way. It bothers me that they’re basically just gossiping. I understand that this is sometimes what happens as we get older, and realize that it’s not me personally (they’re like this with everyone who has been in this position).

I don’t see myself as a victim, because I can admit, though I’m working hard 95% of the day, I do occasionally take breaks to check the news, catch up on an email, or stuff like that. Hey, I’m human.. not perfect : ). I don’t know what they do, because I don’t worry about every little detail of their day… So, I have been praying for guidance on what to do about this situation. Do I also start to keep track of what they do so when my manager says something to me, I have something to say to defend myself? Do I just ignore it? Do I bring it up and say something? Do I stop talking to everyone? Do I quit my job (which is tempting)?

I didn’t do any of the above. So far, I have just gone about my day, hoping that if I continue to just be myself, and nice to them, and loving, they’ll realize, “man, I’ve done all this mean stuff, and this person is STILL nice to me”  and it will show them what kind of person I am and what kind of heart I have. I want God’s love to shine through me. I’m glad we’re studying Romans 12, because this verse is perfectly fitting for what I’m going through right now:

Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable. Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone.

Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say,

“I will take revenge;
I will pay them back,”*
says the LORD.

Instead,

“If your enemies are hungry, feed them.
If they are thirsty, give them something to drink.
In doing this, you will heap
burning coals of shame on their heads.”

The relationship we have with other people is literally a direct parallel to the relationship we have with God.

We say “God, I’ve done all these bad things, I’m a sinner, and yet, you STILL forgive me and bless me”. Its crazy humbling!!! And if God can forgive us, who are we to say “Oh no, I’m gonna hold a super-grudge- this person did me wrong!”. We’re nobody! If God can send his son to die for the forgiveness our sins, we can certainly find it in our hearts to forgive others.

So, anyway, I will continue to pray for my co-workers (and myself!), and hope that God works on their hearts, through me if possible .

I’ve been feeling bummed the past few days, and wondering what it was going to take to get me out of this funk. I don’t tend to worry about my “funks” too often because they don’t come around very much, and when they do, they usually don’t last too long, but I think its impossible to be 100% happy all the time and so these times don’t worry me. But I don’t like the feeling, so I’ve been praying, and reading, and praying more and asking for God’s wisdom and guidance, and spending quiet time, and then praying more.

Last night, on my way home, I asked the question I think we all have asked at one point or another: WHY?

Not in a “Why me?” sense at all (I’m not THAT special), but in a general “Why? Why do bad things happen? Why do we suffer? Why does God let us get sad? Why do we get sick?”  Immediately, what came to my head (which I’m sure was the Holy Spirit directing me back to God’s word) was Job 1:21-22:

Naked I came from my mother’s womb

And naked I shall return

The LORD has given,

And the LORD has taken away.

Praised be the name of the LORD!

In all of this, Job did not sin by blaming God.

I know we all probably know the story of Job, and know that scripture well, but as I kept reading, I thought, “Man, THIS is suffering! Not the tiny stuff I’m going through!” I feel like I was drawn to the book of Job last night so I could be reminded what true suffering was, and Job was blameless! He was a righteous man in the eyes of God, and yet, he was tested.

What we go through is sometimes so small compared to the omnipotence (One having unlimited power or authority) and omniscience (infinite knowledge, One having total knowledge) of God.

I cannot even pretend to try to understand God’s reasons, I’m  just a mere human..

Then, in the end, I’m reminded of Jesus’s teaching from the sermon on the mount:

Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?

Matthew 6:26-27

So, all of a sudden, that “funk” doesn’t seem so bad, right?

“ The reason why we should make money, get our personal finances in order, work at becoming debt free and in general be better stewards is so that we can share with those in need and be a help and benefit to other people.  Why?  Because loving and serving others for Jesus sake is what brings ultimate and lasting joy!”- Jason Topp, Redeeming Riches

I (HONESTLY) could not have said this better myself! All of my adult life, I have been a “giver”. I say adult life, because my brother was born when I was 12, so I practically grew up an only child, and even after he was born, there really was no need to ever share my things with him, and I was much much too old for handing anything down to him (except maybe some Dr. Seuss books, which I don’t think I gave willingly because books have sentimental value to me, and I just KNEW he’d ruin them- which of course, he DID).

But, when I was 15 and then again when I was 16, my parents let me go to Cuba, where I learned the true meaning of not having anything, and giving to those less fortunate. I’ll never forget the unplanned leaving my favorite pair of Nike’s to my grandfather’s sister, who happened to be the same size as me. I don’t think I ever told anyone, and no one ever asked why I came back in flip flops.  That was probably my first experience with giving something away that I cherished (I KNOW- they were sneakers… but I was also 16- we cherish different things then ).

Anyway, so fast forward about 10 years, and I still LOVE giving. I love giving more than anything. Not only do I feel I’m helping others, I honestly feel it’s my DUTY, because I can. I feel like if you have the ability, you MUST.

Proverbs 3:27-28 tells us,

“Do not withhold good from those who deserve it, when it’s in your power to help them. If you can help your neighbor now, don’t say, “Come back tomorrow, and then I’ll help you.””

So, not only is it NICE to help others, but we’re commanded to by God’s word.

Which gets me sort-of back on point. Lately, I have been on a crazy kick to get out of debt and get everything paid off so I can feel financial freedom. But this freedom isn’t so I can go out and buy more clothes, or shoes, or a nicer car! Its so I can go out and help people by giving resources and my time without feeling the financial pressure of “Can I take time off work to do the work I feel called to do?”.  Whether its outreach, volunteer work, mission trips, or just charitable donations, getting your finances in order so you can give generously not only helps shape other’s lives, it helps shape YOU!

Ecclesiastes 3

A Time for Everything
1 For everything there is a season,
a time for every activity under heaven.
2 A time to be born and a time to die.
A time to plant and a time to harvest.
3 A time to kill and a time to heal.
A time to tear down and a time to build up.
4 A time to cry and a time to laugh.
A time to grieve and a time to dance.
5 A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.
A time to embrace and a time to turn away.
6 A time to search and a time to quit searching.
A time to keep and a time to throw away.
7 A time to tear and a time to mend.
A time to be quiet and a time to speak.
8 A time to love and a time to hate.
A time for war and a time for peace.

9 What do people really get for all their hard work?10 I have seen the burden God has placed on us all.11 Yet God has made everything beautiful for its own time. He has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God’s work from beginning to end.12 So I concluded there is nothing better than to be happy and enjoy ourselves as long as we can.13 And people should eat and drink and enjoy the fruits of their labor, for these are gifts from God.
14 And I know that whatever God does is final. Nothing can be added to it or taken from it. God’s purpose is that people should fear him.15 What is happening now has happened before, and what will happen in the future has happened before, because God makes the same things happen over and over again.

The Injustices of Life
16 I also noticed that under the sun there is evil in the courtroom. Yes, even the courts of law are corrupt!17 I said to myself, “In due season God will judge everyone, both good and bad, for all their deeds.”
18 I also thought about the human condition—how God proves to people that they are like animals.19 For people and animals share the same fate—both breathe* and both must die. So people have no real advantage over the animals. How meaningless!20 Both go to the same place—they came from dust and they return to dust.21 For who can prove that the human spirit goes up and the spirit of animals goes down into the earth?22 So I saw that there is nothing better for people than to be happy in their work. That is why we are here! No one will bring us back from death to enjoy life after we die.

When asked what was the greatest, most important commandment, Jesus answered LOVE. I, too, believe this is the most important directive we get from Jesus’ teachings.

First, love the LORD your God with all your heart, and second, love your neighbor as yourself. At the Leadership Summit this weekend, some of the speakers asked, “who is your neighbor?”. They talked about helping the poor, the sick, the destitute, the poverty stricken, what many call “the least of these”. I think we absolutely SHOULD help those, our neighbors, and brothers and sisters in Christ, but people get overwhelmed when they see the AIDS epidemic in Africa. Or the poverty in South America or Asia. They think “how can I make a difference there? Its so HUGE!”.

Its the age old question of ‘How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time!’.

I think we need to start somewhere, and for many people, its a more local, practical application of God’s love. Make the decision to be a little nicer to your friends and family, even if they’ve done something to wrong you. Forgive, even if you don’t think they deserve it. Forgiveness doesn’t free someone else, it frees YOU. Be more patient when driving, don’t honk as soon as the light turns green and the person in front of you doesn’t move. Say hello, goodbye, please, and thank you to anyone who serves you throughout the day. Remember, your waitress/cashier/delivery man are people with lives, children and worries.

You can always practically apply Jesus’ command to love your neighbor on a daily basis, and you’ll see, the more loving you are, the more love you’ll want to give, when you see the impact it makes on other people’s lives and especially yours.

Any comments on love, or random acts of kindness you’ve done?