September16

I tend to write about what’s on my mind, and with the past day’s news, the thought of kids has been on my mind a LOT. When I was younger (and much more selfish and self-centered), I always thought I didn’t want kids, at ALL. None. I was going to travel the world, and enjoy life. It was too much of a risk and too much of a challenge to be responsible for raising another little person who would depend on me for EVERYTHING for at least 15 years. And then, after that, the effect of my “teaching” would last that little person the rest of their lives. Whoa. It was HUGE. Too much responsibility for me to fathom.
As I’ve gotten a little older, my mind changed, as I suspect it does for most people, although the idea of raising children correctly has gotten no less scary. I once asked my mom how she did it (barely being an adult when she had me at 20), and she said something so WISE (as she usually does). She said “You grow up at the same time your kids are growing up. Everyone grows at the same time”.
Yesterday, there was a fight, and subsequent stabbing and murder of a 17 year old boy by another 17 year old male student at Coral Gables Senior High School down here in South Florida. It started out as a “normal” fist fight between the boys in between classes (according to news reports), however, it quickly escalated, and in front of the student body, one student pulled out a switchblade and stabbed the other in the chest, killing him. The boy who was killed was a recent Cuban immigrant, and had arrived in this country only 5 months ago. His mother is still in Cuba, and his father is in Spain. He was under the care and supervision of a 20 year old cousin here in the United States. Can you imagine what his parents will feel when they learn that their son has been murdered?? Its incomprehensible to me.
The even scarier thing is that here in Florida, a law was passed a few years ago, that if someone is killed in the act of self defense, they cannot be prosecuted for any kind of homicide. I suspect that the legal arguments will revolve around which boy was “defending” themselves, and eye witness accounts of who started the fight. This is just my armchair legal opinion, as I’m certainly no criminal defense lawyer, but law does interest me so if I were a lawyer, the first thing I would try to establish was who started the fight, and who was defending themselves.
Legal technicalities notwithstanding, I can’t imagine the pain these families are going through. Both families… the family of the boy who did the stabbing I am sure is no less devastated, and my prayers go out to all of them.
I guess my point, in the end, is with the rise in teenage violence, there are so many things that can’t be controlled at home. Even if you do everything right, there’s a chance that something like this could one day happen…
Can any parents comment on how you deal with this? Please share some wisdom with those of us who don’t have kids, but one day might….